lexi's screwtape letters: at this point, i really wish i had weed to blame for my incompetence.
there is a severe deficiancy of honesty in our world.
if you (or someone you know) is sad all of the time, they're either;
A. too stupid to see what is around them, or B. lying.
if you (or someone you know) is happy all of the time, they're either;
A. too stupid to see what is around them, or B. lying.
i'd like to believe that i am honest enough to evade the aforementioned tragic flaws.
and with this website, i plead my case.
click on the frequency knobs, and stuff from the brain of yours truly will appear.
click on the bottom knob, and stuff about yours truly shows up. (and please, spare me the "boob tube" jokes.)
Saturday, January 13, 2007
where the hell am i going in such a hurry?
i am burnt out.
and that is in no manner a refrence to the amount of drugs i've never used.
i'm just burnt out on evangelical...ish...ness.
i need relationship...ish...ness.
and awe.
and wonder.
and community.
and my best friend.
and a one way ticket to upper middle class.
oh...and some scholarships would be nice.
and someone to challenge me. that hasn't happened in a while.
damn...i must really be screwing this whole sanctification process up...i've pretty much ceased to sanctify.
i'm stuck somewhere between...bored and...and...defiant. and foolish. did i mention bored? the trinity of fecklessness.
feck·less /ˈfɛklɪs/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[fek-lis] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective
1.
ineffective; incompetent; futile: feckless attempts to repair the plumbing.
2.
having no sense of responsibility; indifferent; lazy.
this is OBVIOUSLY my issue.
i wish something would bowl me over here pretty quickly, otherwise i think my zeal may tanker off the coast of africa ( that is, the coast i'll probably never see).
am i the only person who happens to feel a little numb to this whole christianity thing?
i was just wondering.
i am burnt out.
and sooooo stereotypical.
alexis
11:30 AM
tidbits
i'm a fan of capatalism, and therefore a super fan of al greenspan.
i dig it when boys teach me things.
the worst song i've ever heard is anything by clay aiken.
i once met george hamilton. google him.
i'm generally wrong.
i generally assume that people know when i'm lonely.
i enjoy solidarity...until solidarity crosses over into lonliness.
i'm a slave for anything c.s. lewis has (had?) to say.
steven colbert's whit. i need'nt say more.
i'm soooo trendy. i'm also a tool who pretends to be anti-trend.
i live for
the feel of a book in my hands.
higher power, and worship therein.
thinking.
the sound of my fingers tapping the keys.
the comforting emptiness of a blank notebook.
text messages.
money.
the english language.
multi-facited...ish-ness.
did i mention the english language?
questions.
a sideways glance, an outstretched arm behind the passenger side seat, and fingers brushing the ends of my hair.
the unattainable five year headache.
is it just me...?
...or can you tell how someone feels about you by the way your name sounds as they say it?
...or does oprah have two faces? (figuritivly? literally? you be the judge.)
...or can someone else sense that our generation is about to go beyond simply dropping the ball...but could possibly drop kick it into oblivion?
...or am i the only one that feels like i'll never beable to afford life?
...or are you too, annoyed with the fact that the faux-hawk is no longer kitschy and cool...i mean, paula abdul is sporting it regularly!
...or does it seem like your life won't be good until you lose twenty pounds and get an ipod?
...or is there someone out there who thinks that the re-vamped, new and improved version of christianity is totally commercial and lame? unless of course, we're talking about jon foreman.
...or...is it just me?
stuff that has changed my life.
aguagates, sweaty pillow cases, 100 pound crosses, "taxi" rides, jet skis, merengue, and fresh milk.
acoustic guitars.
the lost generation.
apolegetics.
religious dogma.
summer.
suvs.
winter.
a prairie home companion.
sisterhood of the traveling jacket...sort of.
rooftops.
the critical thinking corner.
the lincoln sign.
john mayer.
bertrand russel.
c.s. lewis.
fox news.
igby goes down.
online poker.
gracie and chandler.
xanga.
fold out couches.
sunfires.
planned parenthood.
composition notebooks.
stuff to think about (for those of you who do so)
"As long as this deliberate refusal to understand things from above, even where such understanding is possible, continues, it is idle to talk of any final victory over materialism." -clive sinclair lewis.
"We live, in fact, in a world starved for solitude, silence, and private: and therefore starved for meditation and true friendship." -c.s. lewis.
"Be sure that the ins and outs of your individuality are no mystery to Him; and one day they will no longer be a mystery to you." -are you sensing a trend here?
"The rich get richer and the poor get — children." -fitzgerald (a liberal golden child) said so.
"I'm glad it's a girl. And I hope she'll be a fool- that's the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool." -Daisy Buchannan.
"Sookie: You call your mother "Mimi"?
Igby: "Heinous One" is a bit cumbersome.
[Sookie nods]
Igby: And Medea was taken." -igd.
"Igby: If heaven is such a wonderful place then how come being crucified is such a big fucking sacrifice?" -igd.
"D.H. Banes: I believe, umm, that certain people in life are meant to fall by the wayside; to serve as warnings to the rest of us; signs posts along the way.
Igby: To where?
D.H. Banes: Success." -igd.
"Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children's children what it was once like in the United States where men were free."
-Ronald Reagan.
"Entrepreneurs and their small enterprises are responsible for almost all the economic growth in the United States."
-Ronald Reagan.
"How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin."
-Ronald Reagan.
"There are no great limits to growth because there are no limits of human intelligence, imagination, and wonder."
-Ronald Reagan.
